Boyd-Panciera Family Funeral Care

Throughout human history and around the globe, people have gathered together to acknowledge the death of a community member. A funeral ceremony is the one (and sometimes the only) opportunity for everyone to come together to acknowledge death, recognize the community's shared loss and share the burden of grief.

Funerals, memorial services and celebrations-of-life can be seen as three points on a spectrum of ceremonial formats. The funeral is most commonly the most expensive of the three, especially when considering the cost of the casket. The cost of any of the three is totally dependent on the choices made during the arrangement conference.

People who would want to be there. Funeral guests serve two roles: to demonstrate support for the bereaved family and to tend to their own sorrow in a shared collective experience. While invitations are not common (service details are typically published in the newspaper or online), it may make sense to reach out to certain individuals to ensure they are aware of the service date/time.

Flowers create a background of warmth and beauty which adds to the dignity and consolation of the funeral service. While not strictly necessary, flowers serve valuable purposes including visual expression of sympathy, love and respect.

Derived from the French phrase 'en lieu', strictly speaking 'in lieu' means 'in place'. It is a directive sentence: 'In place of flowers, contributions may be made to…'. However, its use doesn't imply you can't send flowers to the service; it only offers a choice of ways to show sympathy. Only when the obituary states 'no flowers please' are you being requested to abstain from sending floral tributes.

Certainly not; it's important to never feel obligated to do anything in response to the death of a community or family member. Actions should always come from the heart.

The preparation can involve different tasks performed by trained and licensed embalmers and restorative artists. The body is temporarily preserved by embalming, refrigeration, or a combination of the two. It is washed, dressed and otherwise groomed, then placed in the chosen casket for viewing.

Sometimes people need to see in order to truly believe. It's a way of confirming the death and an opportunity to say goodbye. It can be a cathartic time where you can share memories, let go of anger or resentment, and come to terms with the death.

It's best done with honesty and awareness. Let them know basically what they can expect. Advise them there will be people there who will be sad and may cry openly, and there will be time for people to stand up and talk. Let them ask questions, reassure them you'll be right next to them. Never force them to go, and always give them the opportunity to change their mind about attending.

Celebrants are trained professionals who believe in the power and effectiveness of ceremony and ritual. A life-cycle celebrant is especially valuable when a family has no religious affiliations or ties to a clergy person or minister. Through careful interviewing, the Celebrant elicits what is meaningful for each client and helps create a ceremony that reflects the client's beliefs, philosophy of life, and personality.

Simply put, 'it depends on the service'. Just as no two movies or novels are the same length, no two end-of-life ceremonies are the same.

Black used to be the only color to wear to a funeral; but not anymore. Today things are less formal than they once were, and it's not uncommon for families to ask prospective guests to altogether avoid wearing black clothing.